Florida School Toolkit for K-12 Educators to Prevent Suicide

It also needs to be a teachable moment for the bystanders. Research has shown that the more bystanders are present, the less likely someone will intervene to stop the bullying. That means one bystander when they are alone and observing the incident is more likely to intervene than when there are several bystanders. It has even been argued that the term bystander is too passive. The term needs to be replaced with witness. When we are a witness to something, we feel responsible to report what took place. Reaching the bystanders/witnesses is the key to reducing bullying in our schools. Empathy is really important to address. Empathy involves putting ourselves in someone else’s shoes. When we can do that, we can envision what it would be like to be treated a certain way. Hopefully, parents discuss empathy with their children as opportunities might arise when watching a movie or television program or discussing something that happened at school. You could ask, “How do you think that person might have felt in that situation?” The parent can help the child envision and empathize with the thoughts that had to be going through the movie character or real child’s mind at the time. 17. There is a high veteran suicide rate in the United States. Are the children of these veterans at a higher risk? F irst and foremost, being a veteran myself, I’d like to thank everyone for their previous or current service. I am very concerned about the number of suicides that have occurred for veterans and even for current active duty personnel. Time magazine had an article a number of years ago stating that 22 veterans die of suicide in the United States every single day. Additional articles state that more currently serving military personnel die by suicide every year than those that die in combat. I am aware of many military initiatives to prevent suicide and to destigmatize mental health treatment. But I’m also aware of where high ranking military professionals have talked about what being “Army Strong” really means is that you don’t need mental health treatment. Some military personnel on active duty have shared with me that they felt they couldn’t obtain mental health treatment as it would be held against them. Our U.S. Congress passed the Clay Hunt Act in memory of a marine veteran who, unfortunately, didn’t receive the mental health services he needed from Veterans Affairs and he died by suicide. Suicide prevention in the military is extremely challenging and I don’t propose that I have all the answers. But it is important that I recognize that since the suicide rate is high for veterans and current military personnel, this means that many families of military personnel have been exposed to suicide. A family that has a suicide occur definitely needs to get counseling support for all its members. Suicide is not inherited, it is not destiny, but it can run in families, largely because of the modeling effect. It is critically important in our families that we tell the truth when a suicide has occurred. In my career, many times a student told me, “I finally figured out what happened to my favorite uncle. He was a marine veteran and he killed himself eight years ago. Why didn’t they tell me the truth then?” My strong recommendation, in developmentally appropriate language, is to always tell surviving children the truth about the death by suicide. Then, answer their questions and assure them that help and treatment will be sought for everybody concerned. How do you help a family when they have lost a loved one to suicide? I believe strongly that families greatly benefit from participating in suicide survivor groups. I had a parent say to me, “No one could possibly know how badly I hurt after the suicide of my child.” My response is that when you go to a suicide survivor group, you’re going to be aware that others have gone through and are coping with the incredibly complicated grief that you are experiencing. Please, go to one of those meetings and give them a chance to help you. I do want to emphasize that it’s important to attend a group specifically for suicide survivors, because parents have reported when they go Florida S.T.E.P.S.