Florida School Toolkit for K-12 Educators to Prevent Suicide
dangerous when one young person engages in it in isolation because they pass out and therefore cannot release the pressure from the rope that they have put around their neck. I encourage parents to be alert for the following: Are there ropes and straps in your child’s bedroom that simply do not need to be there? Have you noticed your child with bloodshot eyes, coming out of their room disoriented, or having marks on their neck? Have you heard a loud thud like someone falling in his or her room? The question of how much to discuss this with young people is actually quite challenging. U nlike my preference for discussing suicide prevention in a classroom setting, I do not recommend discussing the choking activity in a classroom or assembly setting. The reason for this caution is that someone in the classroom will inevitably speak up and say, “Oh, yeah. I did it, and I felt really cool. I got the feeling of elation afterwards.” This is the problem with discussing it in a group. However, given the tremendous danger of the choking activity, I do believe it is important for the parents of middle school adolescents in particular to have a discussion with them. It might be best brokered with a lead in question such as, “Hey, I heard something about this choking game or activity. What is that?” And, then the parent listens and then talks about the dangers of the behavior. For more information I encourage everyone to visit the Games Adolescents Should Not Play Foundation at gaspinfo.com . 23. What are some effective suicide prevention programs? A s previously discussed, I highly recommend Signs of Suicide (SOS). Another program is Sources of Strength, which provides a broad- based approach to teaching young people how to recognize when they or someone they know is suicidal. It also promotes various sources of strength, resiliency factors, and key skills that all promote social and emotional wellness for young people. Other widely used programs are Lifelines and Signs Matter. 24. Should I read my child’s texts, Google hangouts, Facebook, Instagram, etc.? How much should I snoop? T his is a great question. I want to again stress that, as a parent, you know your child the best. You should be in a good position to address whether everything is healthy and appropriate in your child’s life now. If you do not believe that things are healthy and appropriate and you are concerned about your child’s behavior, friendships, and websites, or if you are seeing signs of isolation, depression, or substance abuse then it is really important that you snoop. My experience has been that parents are often extremely high on denial and they are reluctant to acknowledge there is a problem and to get help. The first place to start is with the school counselor, “I am concerned about my child for these reasons … can you give me some information about how things are going at school? Does this seem out of the norm for you? You’re trained as a counselor. Do I need to get some mental health treatment for my child in the community?” Please, share your concerns with the school counselor and determine whether you need to snoop and most importantly, do you need to seek mental health treatment for your child. To be honest, the majority of the time in my 40-year career as a psychologist, when the parent described to me what was going on and asked, “Should I be worried? Should I go get help?” Nearly 100 percent of the time the answer was yes, and the parents knew I was going to say that. They simply needed to hear it. If your child has lost a friend to suicide, then I strongly encourage you to monitor their communication to others through social networks and seek mental health treatment for them. 153
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